In the spring of 2010, we took the 5/8 5th and 6th graders on a field trip to a farm where one of the 5/8 leaders lived. The boys played manhunt while I prepared dinner, and then we ate outside. After dinner, the boys resumed playing. Two of the 5th graders started play fighting; I yelled from the porch where I was still eating for them to stop. Unfortunately, one of the boys’ swings accidentally hit the other boy in the nose, and he started bleeding. The boy who got hit became visibly upset and approached the boy who hit him with clenched fists. I was ready to run to separate them, but I didn’t have to; a sixth grader stepped between them and quelled the incident. That semester, we were studying the Sermon on the Mount during our Monday night meetings, and we had just gone over “Blessed are the peacemakers” a few weeks earlier. I made sure to praise the peacekeeper in front of the rest of the group before we headed home that evening.
Also that night, we made a bonfire and sat around it making s’mores. We started talking about one of the 5/8 leader’s upcoming wedding, and one of the boys made a crude remark. Before I responded with “That’s inappropriate” (my standard response in such situations), a 6th grader said it for me.
While I recognize that these two 6th graders may not have responded in the same exemplary way without our supervision, I was still proud of them for showing positive leadership by helping to police the group and encouraging their peers to do what was right. For me, their actions affirm that by our modeling how to respond to conflict and/or inappropriate behavior in a constructive manner, they will practice it themselves, and hopefully carry it with them beyond the boundaries of the club.
